The sun has not yet risen, but the mother has. This has been one of the most emotional, heart-wrenching, wisdom-seeking weeks for the family.
Once again, the mother was drawn to the courthouse, where the beauty of old wood and the smells from yesteryear greeted her upon opening the door. She was welcomed by the court clerks, people she's known for most of her life. They led her quickly to the file, to read through once again, this time in search of another address, that of her son, while his mother was still alive. He wants to revisit his old neighborhood in Tennessee, to drive past his former school, to bring back the memories of the time when life was simple, far less complicated.
The mother poured over the pages in the file, not finding the address she had hoped for. She did, however, come home with two important pieces of information.
The first:
She found a name, nothing more, but a the name of a person she would try to locate. This person may hold information about her son's life with his mother, and perhaps, she would remember their address.
The second:
She learned something she almost wished she didn't know. She was aware that her son had lived with two other families before coming to live with his forever family. She knew the first family he lived with was in the home of his mother's best friend. She knew his mother had left him money. She had been told the funds were mismanaged. What she didn't know was that his mother had left him over a quarter of a million dollars!!!!!!!!
When he joined his forever family, less than one-fourth of that remained.
Her son had once asked her if she knew how much money his mother had left him. She didn't know. Now, she did. She had to tell him. He asked.
She drove home with the information. Reluctantly, she shared. How could your mother's best friend, and later her brother mismanage the trust your mother had lovingly prepared for you, when she knew she was dying???
The son left for a soccer game.
The mother returned to the name:
She searched the name on whitpages.com, and learned there were at least three people by that name living in TN. She decided to call the one who lived closest to her son's hometown. What difference would it make, in the grand scheme of things, if the person she contacted was not the one she hoping to find?
Her first attempt exceeded her imaginations...just like Jesus.
Yes, she remembered the biological mother, she remembered her son, she remembered their address, she knew the school he had attended. She remembered.....
These two women spent nearly an hour on the telephone, their only connection in life, a child they both loved. The new contact had so much information. She was with the mother when she moved to TN. She was with the mother when she gave birth to the son. She was with the mother when she was dying.
She has photos. She was the friend who gathered the things that were to be her son's, things that were given to the guardians, some of those things lost now. She has more photos, though. She would gather them. She wants to see the son when the family passes through. She will bring the photos. She has something greater.......
She has his mother's ashes.
The son's mother had requested that her friend be the one to scatter her ashes in the ocean. Her friend, after 11 years, had not been able to complete the final request. She had cleaned the home. She and her husband had cared for the son while the mother was dying in the hospital. She had been through every one of the mother's things before her son moved to Florida with the family friend, following the death of her mother. She had fulfilled every request of the mother, but she and her husband, who also loved the mother so, were never emotionally able to complete the last.
She will give the ashes to the son.
The mother has much to share with the son following his soccer game.
Then events took another turn.
The friend who mismanaged her son's trust fund, the friend who had no contact with her son for 8 years....that friend called her son!!
She asked him to have dinner with her. She wants to see him. Her sisters want to see him. Her nieces want to see him. Would he be comfortable driving alone to a town between their homes to meet?
Yes, he told her, he was comfortable driving alone. When he hung up the phone, however, he told his family he has NO intentions of meeting her alone. He wants his family to join him.
Could you please be in prayer for the son? Could you please be in prayer for his parents? Could you please pray that the LORD will speak peace to hearts, that there might be reconciliation, that the son can boldly, but lovingly, ask his mother's best friend what she did with his money?
Will you please pray for his strength when he is given his mother's ashes on Tuesday?
And, will please pray for the peace that passes understanding on Thursday when he meets his biological father for the first time?
The mother will forever be grateful for your prayers.
Can we, together, anticipate the inconceivable?
Friday, June 26, 2009
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I stumbled upon your blog a couple of months ago...I think from an adoption yahoo group. I have been faithfully reading your updates ever since. I will be praying for you all in the upcoming week. I know it will be a hard week for everyone but I trust that God is going to bless this time for you and your son. Thank you for sharing your story.
ReplyDeleteRobbie,
ReplyDeleteWe will definately be praying. You guys have so much to ponder and take in. God knows this must be the right time.
Amy
I'm back online after being away. I'm moved reading this latest update. Oh my. Please know that I'll be thinking and praying for you all. You have a HUGE week ahead of you. Safe travels. Our MI weather is turning a bit cooler this week (lower 70s). Pack a few warm sweatshirts. Lots of hugs!!
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