Ever More

I love the beach, and often feel so close to God when we are there. As I walked along the beach at Palm Coast this summer, I felt as if God were speaking to me, telling me of a new work I would do for him. I remembered a scripture I had read years before, but I wasn't able to find, not then anyway. I thought of our mission trip and wondered what purpose I might have after we came home from Africa. As I pondered and prayed, I began thinking BIG thoughts and dreaming BIG dreams. My dream included building a home for orphans. (I was thinking China at the time.)

As the time drew near for our mission to South Africa, I began to focus on the work he would have for us there. I began to anticipate the inconceivable.


I would never have imagined that I would find such joy in seeing Shandakani, the first child we identified to sponsor, or that I would feel sadness in my heart when I saw her for the last time before we came home.



Nor could I have imagined the love I would feel for a little boy who jumped into my arms, put his arms around my neck, and rested his head on my shoulder. I never anticipated the joy I would feel when I was able to see Adi one last time or the excitement of learning he would be the second orphan we would sponsor in the school next year.



As I have been praying Ephesians 3:20, and as our mission team read and claimed Habukkuk 1:5, God began to move in ways we would never have imagined, and would hardly have believed, even if we had been told.

We would learn that Brad and Hazel Palmer of Build the Nations had wondered if they should begin providing a home for orphans. As they learned of our desire to work with orphans, they contacted a local pastor. He helped them identify Faith, Solomon, and Shandakani. Visiting the home of their grandmother and learning of their situation, they began to make plans to bring the children to the mission base to stay Monday-Friday. Their grandmother is 84 years old, slightly crippled and blind in one eye. She and the children are excited about the possibility of their staying at the school during the week. The children wanted to go to school on Saturday!

Then, as I fell in love with Adi at Auntie Lydia's, I was moved to ask Hazel if she thought Adi could be the second orphan we sponsored. But, Hazel took it a step further and asked Auntie Lydia if Adi could live on the mission base, at least during the week. She also made plans for Zuavhudi to do the same.

Hazel began to talk with me and others on the mission team. She shared her dream of building a home for orphans on the base, and we shared her excitement. We were quickly promising to come home and help raise funds to build that house!!!!

That night in my prayer time, I thought, for the first time, of the prompting from the LORD while I was at the beach. And, just like Jesus, I found the scripture I had looked for earlier, but couldn't find. I found it when it was TIME. "Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert."

It was time, the time was now, for the new thing to spring forth. I was in the wilderness in Afria, in the dry season, where the place looked like a desert. God was showing me clearly the new thing. And, as I read more, I found Isaiah 45:2, "I will go before thee, and make the crooked places straight."

So, ever more than I could have imagined when we felt called to go to Africa, ever more than I could have imagined when we left home, we broke ground for the new building for orphans, a step of faith, before we left Africa.




Look carefully at the photo with Josie-Tatum in the foreground. You will one day see a new thing spring forth from the plot of land that looks like a wilderness. You can be part of the new work for Jesus by joining us in prayer. And, if the LORD leads your to contribute monetarily, please email me at rbmattox@bellsouth.net

Join me in.....Anticipating the Inconceivable.

(You can read more about Faith, Solomon, Shandukani, Zuavhudi, and Adi at our family blog...http://meimeimakesfour.blogspot.com )

Confessions

The wisdom of the world is that an honest confession is good for the soul; but the wisdom of our Heavenly Father is, "Confess your faults one to another, and pray for one another."

Today, I confess my weakness. That is a good thing, because He promises that His strenght is perfect in our weakness. Today, more than ever, I request prayers for me.

I confess that the journey of last week, the journey that took our Brandon to meet his biological father, has drained me physically, emotionally, and even more spiritually. I believe I am malnourished. I feasted on Olive Garden Grilled Chicken and Shrimp Carbonara, on the best cheese steak sandwich I've ever eaten, on lots of salad, and too much fast food. I am weak, though, because I did not take enough time to feast on God's word.

In 10 days, Josie-Tatum and I leave for South Africa. I must spend the next ten days preparing for the battle, sanctifying myself for the work of the LORD.

Please pray for me. I feel so weak. I feel so inadequate. I am working to restore my vision. I know that God will do more than I can ask or imagine, but I believe in the power of intercessory prayer as well.

I thank Him that tonight, our pastor reminded me that there is power in praise. I thank Him that our pastor reminded me that I am energized by praise and worship music. I praise Him because Jesus knew I needed to be reminded of that, and our pastor was obedient to deliver the message to the flock, so I could hear.

I thank Him that He prompted me to pour out my heart tonight to my church family, and they began to pray for me. I thank Him for the sweet prayer of Brother Ricky. I thank Him for the sweet words of Mrs. Caroline who said she was lying in bed praying for Josie-Tatum and me last night. I thank Him for those who came to me with love and hugs and words of encouragement.

I praise Him that I had begun to think that preparing our thank you letter for those who have contributed would help me remember where we began and where God has taken us. It would help me remember that this mission was ordained by Him. He sent affirmation by a visit to a blog.

And, I praise Him again, for giving me more than I asked for, for affirming more of His sweet words to my soul. As I was seeking direction for Bible study, I thought about Joshua. Feeling weak, I thought I needed the words that remind us to be strong and very courageous, for our God is with us. I had decided I would study the book of Joshua as I prepare for the mission.

Then, just like JESUS, he affirmed for me that Joshua is indeed where I need to spend time, and a letter of thanks to others can be a remembrance and encouragement for me. I went to Linn's blog. (Many of you know Linn, but if you don't, you should get to know her by clicking here.) Linn spoke of her memorial box, and I knew then that our thank you letter could be a memorial box for me. Then I followed the link to her first memorial box post, and do you know where her scripture reference came from? Of course, you do. It was from Joshua. Affirmations of the evening #1 and #2.

Now, to some of you who are less inclined to believe in my God who is the Wonder-Working, Awe-Inspiring, Jehovah-Jireh, this might be hard to believe. But, just now, while I was typing this post, pouring out my heart, asking for prayers, my son Caleb and his girlfriend came in with the local newspaper. In this week's paper is a story about our mission trip. I read it and wept. There is a quote in the story from the missionary who founded Build the Nations, where we will be serving. Here is what he said of Josie-Tatum's visit, "These kids have never had a visit by another child who cares about them, let alone one from overseas, and that alone will bless them."

So, Big Shout Out Praise to the Wonder-Working, Awe-Inspring, Jehovah-Jireh for already sending answers to my heart's cry. Please pray with me and anticpate the inconceivable!

The sun has not yet risen, but the mother has. This has been one of the most emotional, heart-wrenching, wisdom-seeking weeks for the family.

Once again, the mother was drawn to the courthouse, where the beauty of old wood and the smells from yesteryear greeted her upon opening the door. She was welcomed by the court clerks, people she's known for most of her life. They led her quickly to the file, to read through once again, this time in search of another address, that of her son, while his mother was still alive. He wants to revisit his old neighborhood in Tennessee, to drive past his former school, to bring back the memories of the time when life was simple, far less complicated.

The mother poured over the pages in the file, not finding the address she had hoped for. She did, however, come home with two important pieces of information.

The first:

She found a name, nothing more, but a the name of a person she would try to locate. This person may hold information about her son's life with his mother, and perhaps, she would remember their address.

The second:
She learned something she almost wished she didn't know. She was aware that her son had lived with two other families before coming to live with his forever family. She knew the first family he lived with was in the home of his mother's best friend. She knew his mother had left him money. She had been told the funds were mismanaged. What she didn't know was that his mother had left him over a quarter of a million dollars!!!!!!!!

When he joined his forever family, less than one-fourth of that remained.

Her son had once asked her if she knew how much money his mother had left him. She didn't know. Now, she did. She had to tell him. He asked.

She drove home with the information. Reluctantly, she shared. How could your mother's best friend, and later her brother mismanage the trust your mother had lovingly prepared for you, when she knew she was dying???

The son left for a soccer game.

The mother returned to the name:

She searched the name on whitpages.com, and learned there were at least three people by that name living in TN. She decided to call the one who lived closest to her son's hometown. What difference would it make, in the grand scheme of things, if the person she contacted was not the one she hoping to find?

Her first attempt exceeded her imaginations...just like Jesus.

Yes, she remembered the biological mother, she remembered her son, she remembered their address, she knew the school he had attended. She remembered.....
These two women spent nearly an hour on the telephone, their only connection in life, a child they both loved. The new contact had so much information. She was with the mother when she moved to TN. She was with the mother when she gave birth to the son. She was with the mother when she was dying.

She has photos. She was the friend who gathered the things that were to be her son's, things that were given to the guardians, some of those things lost now. She has more photos, though. She would gather them. She wants to see the son when the family passes through. She will bring the photos. She has something greater.......

She has his mother's ashes.

The son's mother had requested that her friend be the one to scatter her ashes in the ocean. Her friend, after 11 years, had not been able to complete the final request. She had cleaned the home. She and her husband had cared for the son while the mother was dying in the hospital. She had been through every one of the mother's things before her son moved to Florida with the family friend, following the death of her mother. She had fulfilled every request of the mother, but she and her husband, who also loved the mother so, were never emotionally able to complete the last.

She will give the ashes to the son.

The mother has much to share with the son following his soccer game.

Then events took another turn.
The friend who mismanaged her son's trust fund, the friend who had no contact with her son for 8 years....that friend called her son!!

She asked him to have dinner with her. She wants to see him. Her sisters want to see him. Her nieces want to see him. Would he be comfortable driving alone to a town between their homes to meet?

Yes, he told her, he was comfortable driving alone. When he hung up the phone, however, he told his family he has NO intentions of meeting her alone. He wants his family to join him.

Could you please be in prayer for the son? Could you please be in prayer for his parents? Could you please pray that the LORD will speak peace to hearts, that there might be reconciliation, that the son can boldly, but lovingly, ask his mother's best friend what she did with his money?

Will you please pray for his strength when he is given his mother's ashes on Tuesday?

And, will please pray for the peace that passes understanding on Thursday when he meets his biological father for the first time?

The mother will forever be grateful for your prayers.

Can we, together, anticipate the inconceivable?

Hearing God Speak

I wonder how many times God has been speaking to me, and I wasn't listening. I sat with Him on the front porch again today, my favorite place to meet with HIM.

Today, I heard the birds singing, the mockingbirds, the cardinals, the sparrows. I heard the the song of the crickets and felt the breeze brush across my face. A hummingbird visited the miniature red roses at the bottom of the step, and then flew past my face. I marvelled at how big our God is.

I began to talk with Him about our mission to South Africa. I have been busy, busy with His work, but I was losing my vision. We have seen miracle afte miracle in His provision for our expenses. His works have far exceeded my imigination, but I was losing focus.

Today, I asked God for a work on my heart, for a renewed passion for our misison to South Africa, just a simple prayer. I closed my eyes and meditated on Him. I saw His face. The, He began to speak in that still, small voice.

I began to see the faces of the children we will minister to in South Africa, and in their faces, I saw His face. I began to sense just a small portion of the love He has for each of them. I felt my arms around them, ready to shower them with love and kisses. I saw the teenagers at the home of Aunty Lydia, and thought of the room they live in. The tears began to flow, and I began to thank Him, to truly praise Him for restoring my vision.

We serve a big God, and we settle for little visions. Get your Bible, go outside, sit in the rocking chair, close your eyes, ask Jesus to give you a vision.
Anticipate the inconceivable.

The Prodigal Father

A Message From the Adoptive Mom

Today, on Father's Day, I sat at church, already with thoughts of our son's biological father on my mind, in my heart. Our son was asked if was going to call his dad and wish him a Happy Father's Day. He emphatically stated that he hadn't even thought about it and he was afraid it might give his dad the wrong impression.

I wonder if our son's Father is thinking of him on this day. I wonder if our son is thinking at all about his biological dad on this day.

Then, in church today, our pastor preached about the prodigal son. It suddenly occurred to me that our son's biological father is a prodigal. I began to cry--tears that have been trapped inside for several weeks now. I pondered all that our son's biological father has missed in the past eighteen years....while squandering his wealth in wild living. He chose not to parent our son. He chose to think only of himself. He has no family; he has only himself to worry about.

But, I wonder if he has come to himself in that distant land, a home a thousand miles away from his son. He is definitely not worthy to called Father. He has done no good thing to deserve that title.

As our pastor preached, I continued to weep, quietly. He told of his own prodigal son, how he feels he failed when he came home. He spoke of our words and the power they have to edify or tear down.

I was reminded that my words to the father can have a tremendous impact, to tear him down or lead him to the TRUTH, to offer criticism or compassion, to share judgment or forgiveness.

I want my son to feel free to express his emotions. Our son's bio dad will never be a dad to him, but they are part of each other. I don't know what will come on the day of the first meeting, but I want the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit with us. I pray that we are able to celebrate that the father who was dead is alive again, the father who was lost is found.

The Father's Face

The adoptive mother was on her way to town this afternoon, when she stopped by the mailbox. It was quite full, the electric bill, a newsletter from a mission team, several other miscellaneous items, and then an envelope for her son. It only took a moment to realize the return address was that of the bio father.

The mother considered going on to town, but only for a moment. She couldn't wait to see what was inside. She put her car in reverse, turned around and pulled back under the carport. She couldn't suppress a smile. She went inside and said to her son, "You know your mother is dying to know what's inside that envelope." It took her son longer than it did her to realize who the card was from.

He opened it, and a check come out. Interesting...isn't it? The father who long ago chose to have no part of his son's life, sent him a $100 check for graduation. The mother wondered...what went through the man's mind when he decided on $100. Did he talk to anyone about his son? Does anyone in his family know that he has a son who lives nearly a thousand miles away?

There was something inside the card that the mother could see...something the son had not yet looked at. She finally asked, "What else is in there?"

The son turned it over, and it was a photo...the first time he had ever seen his father's face. The mother wondered what he was thinking. He didn't say anything. She finally said, "You don't look like him at all." Her son said, "No, I don't." He looks like so much like his mother who only had the blessing of loving her son for six years. Her son remained quiet...is he disappointed? How many visions has he had in the past 18 years, imagining what he might look like?

There was another photo, that of his grandmother. Her son has several people in his life who are his grandparents, but this woman, now 90 years old, is the only one who is bioligically related to him. Does she know she has a grandson?

Tonight, the mother will ponder again as she falls asleep. What is her son thinking? As soon as the adoptive father came home, the son said, "You want to see what my dad looks like?" She knows it is on his mind, though that's the only time he's mentioned it since the envelope arrived.

The only handwriting on the card read, "Looking forward to meeting you soon." The meeting is to take place in two weeks. Please pray for the father and for the son. Please pray for the family. Please pray peace, strength, and wisdom for the family.
Join me in expecting the inconceivable.

No Less Than Remarkable

I stand amazed at all that God has done. We committed to the mission trip just over two months ago, and we have more than we need to go to South Africa. He is truly the God of Ephesian 3:20. He is able to do exceedingly more, immeasurably more, than we could ever ask or imagine. And, to Him be glory!

When we committed to the mission trip, we were seeking $6,000. It was not until God spoke to me through a child's $5.00 offering that I began to ask for enough money for our expenses, and enough to sponsor an orphan's schooling for a year. Tonight, we achieved both goals with $100 remaining. We will receive another offering tomorrow night at VBS and have a Father's Day Cake Sale planned already. I am learning to anticipate the inconceivable with every step of our journey.

Today, I visited Katie's blog and was reminded of all that God can do through one faithful servant. I pray to see more of His wonder-working, awe-inspiring goodness.

I am truly amazed at all that God has done. The miraculous provision for us, when we just committed to the mission in March is nothing if it is not REMARKABLE! If there had ever been any doubt in the beginning that we were on the right path, that doubt has been blown away by God's faithfulness.

I can't wait to see what He does next! Join me in anticipating the inconceivable.
Robbie

The Father's Voice--Part 5: The Heart of the Mother Doth Sing

The mother has waiting anxiously since last Friday, the day she called her son's father. She left a message he did not return. Each day her son has asked her if his father returned his call. Each day her heart would break when she had to tell him, "No." Her son would once again say it didn't matter, but the mother knew the words from his mouth were not the feelings of his heart.

The mother called the father again yesterday. Once again, she only reached his voice mail. She petitioned her Heavenly Father, admitting she didn't know how to pray. She sought a few prayer partners to join her. She went to bed each night and awoke each morning with the her son and his father weighing heavily on her heart and mind.

Today, she was in the home of a dear friend. They had poured over her son's life book, a recent gift from a distant relative. They talked of the biological father. Then, they began to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for their young children.

With her hand on a knife in the peanut butter jar, her phone rang. The mother knew it was not her husband or one of her older children, for their rings are different. She quickly took her phone from her pocket, took a deep breath and told her friend, "It's him!"

She walked outside to be away from the chatter of 5 young children. She could hardly contain her excitement when the father spoke her name. When she told him the dates her family would be near his home, he said he would be sure to be in town that week. His home is 1,000 miles away from her. He said he would glad to drive south to meet them, and might still do that. She has plans to invite him when they meet in his hometown.

Please continue your prayers for each member of the family. May the LORD continue to prove Himself Faithful. May they feel His all-sufficient grace. May our Holy God do immeasurably more than they could ask or imagine. Please join them in anticipating the inconceivable!

Wow! Oh! Wow!

The LORD has continually amazed me since our committment to the mission. Since March 23, we have received gift totally nearly $6,000.

Then, today, you know what happened today.......

We received a gift, an anonymous gift...are you ready??????

We now have more than $6,000.

We now have $250 more than $6,000!

We are now on the way to sending an orphan to school. I asked God to do more than we first asked. He's just begun!!!!

Praise the LORD!

The Father's Voice--Part 4--The Mother's Heart-Ache

Tonight, the heart of the mother aches.

Plans have been made to meet the father, and she made him aware she would contact him when they were done. The fluttering of her stomach began again as she called the father, calendar in hand, to discuss with him the dates of the summer. She heard his voice again, only it was his voice mail. He only spoke his last name.

She left a message for him to return her call. That was yesterday afternoon, and she's yet to hear from him. She has prayed and petitioned The Heavenly Father to speak to her earthly father. She has fear that her son will face rejection once again, something he's know too many times.

The son's words send the message that he's not concerned, but the mother's heart feels a different story. He has been quiet today, uninvolved. While he had earlier said it would be okay if his father didn't want to meet him, she was surprised when he asked if she had reached the father. When she told him she left a message, she wasn't concerned. Now, more than twenty-four hours later, she is.

Would you join her in prayer, prayer for the father, prayer for the son, prayer for peace? Would you pray that moving of the Holy Spirit on the heart of the father? would you pray that he come to know the Heavenly Father? Would you join the mother in asking the Father to do more than she could ask or imagine?

Wonder-Working, Awe-Inspiring, Jehovah-Jireh

Sing unto him, sing psalms unto him; talk ye of all his wondrous works. Psalm 105:2
I posted a similar post on our family blog, but I must talk of HIS WONDROUS works again.

How can we put into words any description of the God we serve? And, yet, how can we sit quietly without talking of his wondrous works?

Josie-Tatum and I committed to the mission trip to South Africa just two months ago. I had no idea where the money would come from. I only knew that God was directing our path to the right people, the right place, all in HIS timing. I knew that God was speaking to my precious 6-year-old child when night after night she was praying for orphans, night after night she was asking God, "Please tell me and Mama where we can go so we can help orphans." I knew we were about the Father's work when her kindergarten teacher came to me to tell me, "Today, someone asked the classe what they would do if they have a million dollars. They all had some extravagant wishes. Then Josie-Tatum said, 'Well, if I had a million dollars, I could help a lot of orphans.'" God has given me a priceless gift, the gift of being Josie-Tatum's mother, the gift of guiding her in HIS plan for her life.

Yet, where would the money come from? Am I Doubting Thomas? Stepping out in faith, committing to the mission to South Africa, having no clue where the finances would come from, I am WAY out of my comfort zone.

After our committment, I was having a major Doubting Thomas day. It only took me a week to go from faith to worry. I had my prayer journal that morning, begging God to show me we were on the right path. I received an email as soon I got to work. The title was, "URGENT: CONTRIBUTION!" We had received our first contribution, and it was more than I ever would have imagined...immeasurably more. It was $900! It was from a dear friend I've never met personally, another mommy with a heart for orphans, one I've prayed for, one who had prayed for me. God was beginning to affirm our decision.

But, we had to pay for our airline tickets...with just the $900 to go towards them. Stan and I agreed that we would take nearly all of our savings to complete the purchase of the airline tickets for Josie-Tatum and me. I think his words were, "We've lived on less." We stepped out in faith, trusting that God would provide. But, like Martha, I had begun to think He was four days late.

We were beginning to see red.....and, while red is the color of celebration in China, our bank has a different perspective. Many had contributed, and, we were in the middle of a fundraiser, but two days before pay day, we were overdrawn at the bank. I knew we would rise above the surface in two days, catch up a little, buy some more time to make up for the $3,100 we had already paid out for airline tickets.

On payday, I went to our online banking screen to see where we stood. There was my check and Stan's check listed, as we have direct deposit. But, there was something wrong with Stan's check. It was $973 too much! No, not $9.73, but $973.00. I knew there must be a mistake. We are both state employees. We can neither one make over-time, etc. We work for a straight salary/contract amount. I waited all day, until after school to call him at the prison. (He's not a prisoner, BTW, he's an officer.) I told him what had happened.

One-and-a half hours later, he called back, "That money is ours!!!!!!!" He had so much comp time built up, and had so much unused sick time and annual leave, he was paid for his comp time, over-time, holiday pay, and days in training. Did you hear me shout? "Praise the LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

We all know Abraham was on the mountain, prepared to make a sacrifice I could never make, when God provided the sacrifice. And Abraham called the name of that place Jehovah-Jirah, the LORD will Provide. God is continuing to provide for us...as long as we are willing to step out in faith, to trust him with every part of our being.

What inspiration He sends when I am living His word.

And, if I could share one more inspiration.

As Josie-Tatum and I have prayed that the LORD would provide for our trip, you may have read of the gifts from children, one who gave a dollar, one who gave five dollars. Josie-Tatum and I did discuss the fish and the loaves, how Jesus fed thousands with the small gift of a child.

And, isn't is just like God when that very night, after I put the little girls to bed, that same story was part of my daily Bible reading? How had I forgotten? They took up of the fragments that remained twelve full baskets!! God not only provided for the needs, he had left-overs. He spoke to my heart, that I should not expect Him to provide only the $6,000 for our mission trip, I should expect left-overs. We had learned that week that the cost of sending one orphan to the school at Build the Nations is $585 a year. I told Josie-Tatum we were going to expect at least $585 more than we asked for, so we could make sure one more orphan goes to school.

Today, I recieved a phone call...phone calls have the habit of being life-changing around here lately. It was from a distant relative, not even a Christian. He asked, "How much more do you need for your trip?" I shared with him that we need $1000 more to cover our expenses, but we are praying for $585 in addition, because we want to be able to send at least one orphan to school. And, do you know what he said. "I have some money coming on the 15th of next month. I'll make sure you have the money to send an orphan to school." Did you read that??????? God is using a man who is not serving Him to provide what we need so we can serve him. Isn't that awe-inspiring? Isn't that wonder-working?

We committed to the South Africa mission on March 23rd. It's just been 2 months, and God has already provided $5,000. That was $5,000 I had no clue, no hint of an idea of knowing how God would provide. Do you see those numbers? God has provided on average, more than $500 each week. Oh, dear friends, how he longs to share His riches with us.

When I am I going to live every day expecting to see the promises of Ephesians 3:20? When will I learn to look for him to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine? Will you join me in looking for the unimaginable?

A Father's Voice--Part 3

The tears began again today, for the mother. In church services, the soloist began to sing, "The Anchor Holds." The mother was sitting by her son, but felt drawn to the altar. As she knelt, the tears began to flow again. "Please let the anchor hold for our son," she prayed. "May he be strong, rooted and grounded in love, that as he meets his father his anchor will hold."

The family is planning to travel to meet the father. The dates are not certain yet, but they hope to travel together. The son asked, "What do I call him...Dad? Mr. ___?"
His mother said, "You call him by his first name." The son said, "You are my parents." The mother felt a sweet peace flood her soul.

The mother believes her son is somehow looking forward to the meeting, though she knows it will be awkward. He has brought it up several times today. "So, do I shake his hand...or give him a hug?" His mother said, "I think it would be appropriate to shake his hand. You don't usually hug a stranger, but you do what you feel comfortable doing."

The son said, "I could give him a high five. But, wait, I don't know anybody who left his girlfriend when she was pregnant. I don't think I would be friends with anybody like that."

Then later the son asked, "You are going to be with me when I meet him, aren't you? You're not going to leave me with him by myself, are you?"

The mother replied quickly, "Of course, we're going to be with you. For two reasons...#1 I know you'll be uncomfortable...but #2 I'm your mother. I want to be there with you, because that's waht mothers do."

The evening dinner table found the two of them sitting together, something that rarely happens. The rest of the family had finished eating, and they were alone. They talked about his past. The discussed life with his first guardians. They talked about his dad. That talked about how awkward a first meeting would be. The mother said, "Have you thought about this? Your father will likely be more uncomfortable than you are. You will have your family with you, and he will be alone. You've done nothing wrong. He has admitted his past mistakes. He will have guilt sitting with him."

The mother shared the sleepless nights she had during the week. The son said, "Really? I haven't lost sleep over someone who chose not to be part of my life for 18 years." But his mother said, "That's what mothers do. It's my job to worry about you." The mother is going to bed tonight. For the first time in a week, she thinks she is finally going to be able to sleep. She had such a sweet conversation with her son, truly one heart to another. It reminded her that her son is stronger than she realizes, yet willing to let her know he needs her! And, for that she is forever grateful.

Please continue to pray the inconceivable.

The Father's Voice--Part 2

The mother didn't shed any tears until the following day. When the busy-ness of the morning ceased, she had time to think. She began to think of the son's birth mom who had passed away when he was only 6 years old, who had missed so much of her son's life. She began to think of the biological father, who had missed every moment of his son's growing up years.

When the tears began, they seemed unending. Try as she might, she could not stop the flow. Why does life hold these heart-aches? What would her son's life have been life had the father accepted responsibility when his son was born, or later when he learned the birth mother was dying. And, then, if her son's life had been different, he never would have joined his current family. The adoptive mother loved him so.

At graduation, the tears were gone, replaced by the pride in all her son had become. There he was graduating in the top 10 percent of his class, honor student, Beta club member, on his way to the top university in the state. He sang the class song, he received his diploma, and when it was over he lifted his mother off the floor with a giant bear hug.

Then, today, her phone rang again...while walking the aisles at Wal-Mart. Again, she heard the voice of the birth father. He asked, "Is now a good time for me to talk with B?" She gave the father her son's phone number. Her last words to him were, "I'm praying for both of you." As soon as she ended the call, she stopped her grocery cart, nearly full of groceries. She bowed her head and began to pray. On a busy Saturday afternoon, many shoppers passed her by. She thought they might think her crazy, but prayer was much more important than their opinions. She called her sister and her parents and asked them to join her prayer.

Some would say that chance had it, that the father and son were not able to connect until the adoptive Mother made it home from shopping. The mother knows it was a God-incident. She would be there as he talked with his father, heard his voice for the first time.

The son was outside when his father called, and walked away from the house down the driveway. His mother kept her eye on him, watching for any signs of distress, or joy. Her son bounced a tennis ball while he talked. He paced. He circled. He talked. The conversation lasted longer than she thought it might.

What relief his mother felt, when her son came inside the house, and began to share his conversation. "It was weird," he said. His mother said, "Of course, it was. You were trying to hold a conversation with a stranger. Did he talk about your mother at all?" she asked. Her son replied, "No, and I didn't want him to. That would have made me mad. He left her. I don't want him to talk about her, as if he cared."

"I told him about myself," he said. "And he wants to meet. He said we could go to him, (hundreds of miles away) or he would come here. I told him I would talk with my family about it. He said he would discipline himself to write to me."

The son went about his day, washing his truck, going out with friends.

The mother was left at home with her thoughts. Then the phone rang again. This time a call from one of her son's previous guardians, once the best friend of her son's birth mother. She had abandoned him, too. As the previous guardian learned of her son's past 8 years of life, the mother held back the emotions she felt thinking of all of those who had abandoned her son. Near the end of the phone call, the previous guardian began to cry, "I am so sorry I left him," she said. "But I am so glad he's found your family. It seems like just the place he needed to be." As she continued to weep the mother found herself saying once again, "Our God's grace is sufficient to cover our weaknesses, and my son is a forgiving young man."

In one week, her son has two people from his past who want to meet him--the father he never met, and the birth-mom's friend who wants to catch up with him, both of whom likely need to make peace within themselves for their past failures. Please continue to pray for them all, the son, the biological father, the previous guardian, the adoptive mother, adoptive father. May there be wisdom in the home, may the son feel the love of his family so strong that he, too, is able to make peace with his past. May the LORD continue to do immeasurably more than his mother can ask or imagine in his life.

A Father's Voice

When the young man turned 18, he began to have more questions about his past. While his biological mother was no longer living, he questioned his adoptive mother about his biological father. She could not give him any answers, but promised to find out what she could.

Her love took her to a court house in small town, though newly remodeled, the smell of old wood filled the air. With the help of a court clerk, she poured through the thick file. While she had expected to find a name, she was taken by surprise to find an address.

When she arrived home, the mother shared with her son the address. "The chances that he still lives there are very small," she told her son. She went to the computer, though, and was further surprised to learn that the biological father still lived at the address that was close to 18 years old.

The young man wanted to send his father an invitation to his graduation, but his mother knew the contents were an invitation to be a part of his life. The young man had never seen his father, had never even seen a picture of him. When he sent the invitation, his mother requested permission to send a letter to the father, as well. "I just want him to know what an incredible young man you have grown to be--in spite of all of the hardships you faced until you joined our family."

The young man agreed to allow his mother to send the letter. She told his story, she told of the difficult days, and she told of his triumps....his honors, his awards. She included her phone number.

She sought the LORD, prayed diligently for the young man and his biological father. She considered Esther, and how Esther has asked many others to pray with her. These prayers softened the heart of the KING. She prayed the letter would find a softened heart, one that had once rejected the young man. She prayed that Jesus would pray for the young man as He has prayed for Peter, that his faith fail not.

And, then today, her phone rang. The mother thought of the Bible account of Doubting Thomas....when the story reads, "Then came Jesus." She began to tremble when he spoke his name. There was silence on the phone. She walked away from the crowd. The biological father and the adoptive mother were both at a loss for words.

The mother said, "You have been prayed for. I was awake last night praying for you."

The father said, "Thank you. Thank you for the letter. I received the graduation invitation, and I thought.....I knew this day would come. He is reaching out to me. I need to send him something. I thought of him all through the night while I was driving my truck. Then, I came home last night, and I found your letter."

Over and over again, the father expressed his gratitude. He shared how the son was a far better man that he. He admitted his failures, and, in his own way, asked for forgiveness.

The mother said, "God is a God of grace, and you have a forgiving son." (Wow, Jesus is THE FORGIVING SON."

The father said he'd like to meet his son. The mother was thrilled, but filled with mixed emotions. How would her son feel? She has heard her son's father's voice. He had never heard it.

Her son will hear his father's voice this weekend. Can you pray, while anticipating the inconceivable. Tonight, there is a family, a biological father, an adoptive father, an adoptive mother, and a son who would be forever grateful.

We serve an awesome God!
Robbie

Adoption----Inconceivable Transformations

I would suspect that most people who have visited this blog are adoptive parents, while the few who are not have been touched by adoption in one way or another. As I felt inspired to begin a new blog, I spent a lot of time thinking about our adoption of Josie-Tatum. Oh, how I prayed for her when we waited, before we even knew who she was. And, since the day she joined our family forever, God has absolutely transformed our lives immeasurably more than I asked or could have imagined.

When we were a family of four, waiting on Josie-Tatum, I never could have imagined we would one day be a family of seven.




After bringing Josie-Tatum home, I sometimes thought there might be another child for our family in China, but I never thought there was another child for us in China and another for us right here in our hometown. I never imagined that Brandon, the young boy who sometimes spent the night upstairs in my home would one day be MY son.



There are as many motivations for adoption as there are families who have adopted. For us, I had a burden for children in orphanages. Listening to the radio progam Focus on the Family, I learned of welfare institutions in China, full of babies in cribs who needed to be held and loved, where there were not enough adults to give the care they needed. After years of prayer, we felt our family could give LOVE to one of those children.

When I first saw this face.

I never could have imagined how much Josie-Tatum would bless me. One night, several weeks after coming home with her, I was lying with her in bed. She was "clapping" her feet saying, "Ma Ma Ma Ma," as she fell asleep. It was then it occurred to me, "I had thought she needed a mama. What I didn't realize was, I needed a baby."

I am sure, too, that the adoption of Josie-Tatum led us to adopt Ellie. And, Ellie brings joy wherever she goes. She is forever smiling, bubbling, bringing smiles to others. She cruises with walker with as much energy as any 4 year old. She surprises all who meet her with her tenacity, her innate ability to overcome obstacles with joy.




But, the most inconceivable transformation comes from Josie-Tatum herself. When we first committed to adoption, I could never have imagined praying nightly with a 6-year-old with a burden for orphans left behind. I never dreamed I would one day be traveling to South Africa with that precious little 14-month-old baby I met on a cold February day in China. Never did I think I would hear a little girl ask, "Mama, do you think there will ever be a day when there are no more orphans?" I could not have imagined the pride that would swell in my heart when that little girl would be asked at her kindergarten graduation, "What do you want to do when you grow up?" And, she would say, "When I grow up, I want to go all around the world helping orphans. I want to take people around the world and show them how they can help orphans."



So, if you'd like to meet this precious gift from our heavenly Father, take a peek at her blog. Pray that God will continue the Wondrous Works He has begun in her heart. Leave her some encouraging words, and join me in anticipating the inconceivable in her life!

Blessings,
Robbie

My Heavenly Father and My Earthly Father--update

I just learned that Brother Ronnie will be preaching nearby on Friday night. Our family will get the opportunity to visit with him!!!


This is my daddy with my baby girls.

I've shared some of my daddy's story on our family blog, but I think this is the most fabulous post to begin my new blog.

I have a wonderful daddy. I don't call him Dad or Father. He's always been Daddy. He came home from work everyday, and when I was little, pretended everday that he couldn't find my sister and me. We were always hiding behind the curtains in our HUGE...um, very tiny 10 ft x 50 ft mobile home.

I grew up with an awesome daddy, but he was an unsaved daddy.

Daddy grew up with a harsh step-father. Other family members have shared that Daddy learned he could only stay out of trouble by staying out the way. He would come home from school and go to his room. He rarely joined in family conversations.

This behavior followed him into his adult years. As I grew up, most of my friends were afraid of my daddy, only because he didn't talk. He was always there, watching television, reading the paper, or working on "projects" outside, but he didn't talk.

As I became a teenager, I started attending church with the neighbors. I was saved at the age of 15 and have since been an active member or the church where I was saved. I would regularly occasionally ask my daddy to church. He would always say, "No." Once he even said, rather sternly, "I have other things I'd rather do on Sunday." Something about the tone of his voice broke my heart AND kept me from asking him to church again for years.

After Whitney and Caleb were born, Mama started coming to church. Daddy would come...when the children were performing. When Daddy was 53 years old... and I was 31, our church started a revival with Ronnie Owens just before Christmas. I was surprised when Daddy showed up on Sunday morning. I was even more surprised to look over from our house while on my way to church Sunday night and see Daddy getting into the car with Mama.

Daddy attended church every night that week through Wednesday. On Wednesday night when the invitation was given, I knew the Holy Spirit was dealing with my daddy. I play the piano, and as I played, I began to tremble and cry. Only a person who has felt the Holy Spirit speak to them can know how I knew. I just knew. I began to cry so hard that the organist came over to the piano and asked if I needed him to play for me. After I told him no, and he walked away, I motioned for him to come back. I had cried so much I couldn't see the music anymore.

I went to the altar and prayed as fervently as I have ever prayed. "Jesus, please save my daddy." I had such a fear that if daddy didn't respond that night, the LORD might not deal with him again. But, Daddy didn't move, and the revival was over.

At the closing Brother Ronnie and our pastor said they felt the revival must go on one more night. Some were excited, but I had lost hope. Our family was leaving early Friday morning to spend Christmas at Disney World. Daddy had to get the campers ready. I knew he would not attend church on Thursday night. He had too much to do.

I spent Thursday quite depressed. After work, I went to see my mama, and my sister was there. They asked, "Are you going to church tonight?" Crazy question...I'm the pianist. But, I knew what they were going to say next. "Your daddy plans to make a public profession tonight."

My sister Bobbie is a dental hygienist. Daddy had gone to get his teeth cleaned on Thursday morning. As he sat in her chair, his hands began to tremble. He told her he was moved to be saved on Wednesday night. He then said he didn't go forward because he was afraid I would pass out! He wanted us to know before he went forward.

Daddy did go forward on that Thursday night, and he has been the most faithful member of our church since.

But, that's not the end of the story. The Ephesians 3:20 moment is...Daddy was forever changed! God changed him in ways that I never would have thought to ask, that I never could have imagined. Suddenly, I had a talkative daddy. The man who never spoke to my friends was busy frightening them again...this time because he WAS talking to them. Daddy is now a deacon in the church, church treasurer, and choir member. He is active in church dramas, goes on visitation, and shares his testimony. He prays long prayers....out loud...especially when you're hungry. ;) My Daddy is a living testament to Ephesians 3:20.

So, to any of you who are praying for your family members. Don't give up. Our God can do immeasurably more than we ask. And, when he does, we will give him ALL the glory!!!